EWW: 2020 as a TV show

I am still flipping sick blinking 'ell.

Do you like how I tried not to swear in the subject line for you? That’s how much I care about you. I am now in my THIRD FARKIN WEEK of being sick. Let me tell you I am over it in a big way. Basically, I developed a chest infection, went on anti-biotics, and then somehow caught a cold on top of my virus. So I managed one day at work and now I’m back in bed. Writing to you.

Apparently the pain I’ve been in has just decimated my immunity. I was quite astounded by this. I read some studies and they’re fascinating. Peter Abaci an anesthesiologist and pain specialist says: “According to past research done in laboratory mice at McGill University, chronic pain may reprogram the way genes work in the immune system. In fact, chronic pain seems to prompt changes in the way DNA is marked in special immune cells known as T cells. While it is unclear how much these changes affect the ability of these T cells to fight infection, there does appear to be a strong connection between chronic pain and DNA marker changes on these important infection fighters.”

I’m just glad my surgery is coming up so I can finally, hopefully, be pain-free. While lying in bed I’ve watched a lot of shit television.

Netflix's new documentary series (Un)Well left me with a deep sense of despair for humanity. I watched it because I'm doing my best to stay off Instagram as it slowly becomes a place where dreams go to die and every dickhead with a smoothie maker thinks they're a truth seeker.

I’ll be honest, I started watching (Un)Well knowing very well that I would hate it. As you already know, I am a pro-vaxxer (paid for big Pharma according to many people in my inbox - Big Pharma, call me! I'm keen!) and I'm highly sceptical of basically everything. I rely on modern medicine to keep my child alive. As such, I have a deep and abiding dislike for the wellness industry that targets the vulnerable for cash and puts lives at risk.

(Un)Well confirmed everything I hate about "Wellness", but it surprisingly showed the industry to be even worse than I'd originally suspected.

The “Wellness economy” was valued at more than $4 trillion in 2018, according to the Global Wellness Institute. That’s roughly the combined GDP of the United Kingdom and Canada.

The first episode on essential oils was so infuriating I had to stop it three times. It made me want to punch a wall.

This is not a stock photo. This is the essential oil guy and his essential oil wife.

The smarmy born-again Christian couple gloating about their enormous salaries while giving their toddler essential oil smoothies to ingest (yes, you read that right) were so extremely loathsome I actually thought they were caricatures.

I was heartbroken for the mother shown looking for anything that would relieve her daughter's stress and anxiety and help her sleep. Multilevel Marketers often target parents of children with autism. She was so loving and so caring and I could see that her belief in essential oils didn't harm anyone else - but I was still gutted for her that she'd been sucked in. Once the placebo wears off, it's just another hurt. And I get it. I have fallen into these traps myself - because what wouldn't you do to try to help your child?

Just when I thought it couldn't get worse, they introduced the companies doTerra and Young Living Essential Oils. Both are multi-level marketing companies some describe as pyramid schemes. In 2016, the most recent details I could find, approximately 94% of Young Living's marketers made less than a dollar. Less than one tenth of one percent of members made over a million dollars. They claim tee tree oil is good for "cancers" and "emotions" (I shit you not - at this point my teeth were a fine dust from grinding them).

I took a break when a woman asked if essential oils will help her husband’s pancreas. He has diabetes. I know that awful feeling of wanting to do anything, anything at all, to change the shitty hand your loved one has been dealt. That's why I hate that people take advantage of others like this. It's such a specific kind of cruelty that seems to grow year on year.

The essential oils episode alone made me so angry a red mist began forming in my bedroom. I screamed into the void for 18 minutes then returned in time to hear the Born Again Asshole claim essential oils cure cancer but of course Big Pharma covered it up.

As if Big Pharma are any different to Big Essential Oils - they're just a bunch of rich pricks ruining the lives of desperate people.

A mum loses everything - her money, her friends, who family - because she's told selling essential oils will give her an income while she looks after her kids, another woman's skin begins to peel off from essential oils and she's told to put more essential oils onto her skin to cure it. It's miserable.

Did I learn anything from this episode? Sure I did. For a start I didn't know about doTerra or the creepy convention for essential oil lovers. But has 2020 been hard enough without being reminded of how awful human beings are and how desperate they are to rip each other off and ruin lives for the sake of a fattening their wallets? YES.

A screen grab from (Un)Well.

It's actually just too depressing. I did start watching episode two, just to be fair on the series. It literally starts with a Zoom session where a bunch of people orgasm loudly while breathing at each other. I mean?? I can only cope with so much.

Then a guy talks about how Western Tantra is cultural appropriation (agree) and that drinking the jizz of a sex demon makes you a sex demon (wait).

When they introduced a man known as Big Daddy who makes and sells boiled peanuts I knew I had to be done. I tried to push myself to keep watching and felt deeply sad for him as he shared his trauma with an extremely unqualified and delusional person who truly believes she has the power to cure his PTSD by squeezing his nipples.

I skipped to episode three. It's adult men drinking breast milk.

"When we broke up. I lost my supply of breast milk".

*High pitched noise only cats can hear*

If 2020 was a television show it would be (Un)Well. It gets worse as you go on - bleaker and darker with every passing minute. Desperate people are being used to make money. There's too much bodily fluid and breathing on people. You're left with a deep sense of hopelessness that we're not worthing saving. And I don't want it.

Still, like 2020, it's not going anywhere, so I guess sit back and watch the horror show.

Finally, I thought I’d end on a lighter note. You might know the karakia Whakataka te hau. I absolutely loved this from Justice Joe Williams about the meaning behind the karakia.

Whakataka te hau ki te uru,
Whakataka te hau ki te tonga.

Kia mākinakina ki uta,
Kia mātaratara ki tai.

E hī ake ana te atākura he tio,
he huka, he hauhunga.

Haumi e! Hui e! Tāiki e!

There’s still hope eh x