34 Comments

Oh wow, I just found the article, and some of it is even worse than your satire. When describing working after age 65: "Maintaining good health and energy is important for maintaining the ability to keep working." Oh cool, let's all just become healthy and able bodied so we can work forever. Too easy.

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See? I need to give up lol

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Unless you have several hundred thousand dollars down the back of the couch that you've forgotten about

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I couldn’t even CLICK on the real article I was so enraged and this made it way better

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author

It is an infuriating article!

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Fluff is a pretty accurate name for how much landlord dick they like to suck

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author

😂😂😂

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founding

Where is the link? I can’t see it! Maybe the universe is protecting me from my own fuming…

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founding

I found it. Gotta be hard to get that assignment as a young journalist, but seriously the content from the so called experts - comic! At least she let them run out the rope so we could have a laugh…but then this topic isn’t funny

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author

I wish this was the case but that's a seasoned financial journalist who is doing repeats of this every week.

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founding

“Cardboard box? Aye, you were lucky! We lived for six months in a rolled up newspaper…”

https://youtu.be/VKHFZBUTA4k?si=e-AGVSEkRnLRKSEG

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It's becoming distressing how close satire is to the reality of some advice...

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Honestly it makes it really hard to write satire when it basically is satire 😅🫠🫠🫠🫠

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The original Stuff article is at https://www.stuff.co.nz/money/350174577/five-things-do-now-if-you-think-youll-never-own-home in case anyone can face actually reading it. The advice seems painfully akin to that issued by the Retirement Commissioner (or some similar title) several years back, which basically stated that if you wanted a tolerable retirement, you needed to get a better paid job now. Why on earth hadn't we all thought of that simple solution?

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Brb gotta get a better job lol

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It's giving Louise Upston... People we kick off the benefit will just go live with their families, or in a bus stop, or something...

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Funny given she left home really young cos she was preggers herself. But she's always been very independent because, well, she had a lot of privilege so everyone else ought to to. Have a lot of privilege I mean.

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author

🫠🫠🫠

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founding

Oh my! At least your article is funny and honest.

The “news” article is infuriating, at least provide one tip that doesn’t involve magically having or earning more money.

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founding

Sigh. I just composed an eat-the-rich suggestion six different ways and then self-censored. Some of this in your essay is not satire? New Zealand is meant to be different, we can do better!

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We can do better. I’ve realised that empathy and compassion are traits which some people- enough to roll a government - are born without.

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“Instead of a three-bedroom house try a studio which is only three bedrooms less than a three-bedroom house.” So funny

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Holy shit, I shouldn't be but I am actually shocked at how much of that is real.

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Top notch satire. Pretty impressive for a Monday!!

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founding

Thank you for bringing some sanity...or non sanity to that ridiculous article

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Bahahhahaahhaa!!! Ok sweet I'll just buy a house.... Duhhhhh 😂😂😂

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I read the actual stuff article but still can’t fig out which quotes were real and which weren’t.

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I know, become Prime Minister. then you can live in Premier House and get the tax payers to extensively renovate! Sorted!!!

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Or get the taxpayers to pay for your renovations while you DON'T live in it and instead live in one of your seven other properties.

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AI's munting of Dick Richwhite's pearly whites is v disturbing!

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Argh too real 😭😂😂😂

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